Sexist...Ouch!

It would hurt boys.

(Read the disclaimer at the bottom of the page before you proceed)

21 to 26 is not a very good age you know. We are neither a teenager nor a full matured adult who is trusted by people to take complete responsibility. We are not too experienced but we do fake about it most of the time. This is the age where we are done with the MCP’s crap of male and share experiences of their large sized male ego. Dating-flirting is outdated for us. Aunties’ and old people preach sermons about marriage and love. Relationships and fairy tale love seems uninteresting, live-in relationships, no-strings attached, scare us. Marriage umm...still has time. All this inhibitions leaves us with a bunch of similar aged girl friends with whom we like to gossip, share and bitch about some unrelated people and who else, ‘boys’, our usual target and how they are ‘so not worth it’ species.
Cafeteria.Restaurants.Malls.Pubs.JoggingPark.Gym.SportsClub.Party’s.Functions.WorkPlace.LateNight Chattering on phone calls and gupshups with my girl friends culminated a series of opinions about Indian men.



What's wrong with Gujju Dikra?Mr.Dikra is sweet and sober, intelligent, iSsmart and has one feet in the air or rather I should say Ameyriicaa (with an extra i). These are the desi bhai with nasal voice and businessman blood. But Mr.Dikra don’t you think you should use your vyapaari minded attitude towards your work and not on your relationships. Do you guys even know that your nasal voice is a serious turn-off (only to those girls including me who hates Himeshhhhh Reshammiyannnn bhai) and when you try to fake Ameyriican accent it becomes all the more worst. Your ‘chu’ and ‘che’s’ instigate our dogs to bark .. just imagine how much it may annoy us.

What's wrong with Mallu Mon?Mr. Mon, the innocent one’s. No matter how badly the girl betrays this weatish man, he will selflessly love her till the end of his living life. Brilliant and outstanding brain-wise, south Indian boys always out-stand in their love life. That also means they stand-out of their lover’s house to see how happy she is in her married life with other man. Emotionally driven they are the soup boys, ‘paavam cherukan’ and these large men also loves drama. Mammotty and Mohanlal over the years have impressioned them with Nadakam. You are Dark. You are Tall. You are Handsome but a little over-sized physique makes you too large to handle. And what’s with that belt on your lungi ? especially, the desi mallu , that is awkward and your tummy looks like a douche bad, a speed breaker or wait baby bump. You need to seriously check your body stats da.

What's wrong with Bangali Baabu?Those nerdy glasses won’t make you geek Mr.Babumoshay. Why don’t you opt for a subtle looking spectacles or even contact lenses in that matter? I mean you people have such an alluring features especially those protruding eyes, look at Bipasha Basu, Konkana sen.. oops sorry they are all bong girls.. excuse me for the comparison. The rosugulla filled voice is a serious plus point but then you know that sweet sonorous tone of voice should be a trait of a woman and not a man’s. The literary knowledge of Bengali boys is a turn-on but Babu what’s with the aggressive stern face or the contrary innocent devdas disposition Baabumoshay? There’s one more expression God has bestowed humans and that is 'smile...twink’. You can use it at times.

What's wrong with Marathi Mulga?“Tujhya Aaicha beep beep beep"! After mastering a degree in profanity these Mr. mulga claims to be ‘the know it all’ saint boy. Uffff!! Well behaved and well mannered in family circuit especially, in front of the adults they are the devil in disguise. The only true color of them is seen by the people who they chose to be close to. Otherwise, there’s always a veil on their face. Community driven like their Gujarati brothers, Marathi Mulga will have many affairs outside their community but will only prefer marrying a holy girl of their community. Family pressure you know that’s the Bs they give to the bechari ex. These Mulga’s tend to have a slight streak of hypocrisy and redundant snobbery. Marathi Mulga’s should understand that the world does not work under their fake atrocities and that’s the reason even in Marathi State they work under Gujarati's or south Indian boss. And what’s with the unnecessary dominance and ego boosting techniques haan! There has been very rare scenario where Marathi Mulga considers female counterparts as their equals and not just second fiddle. I don’t want to sound harsh on Maraathi Mulga but all my girl friend don’t think high about Mulga’s attitude.

What's wrong with Punjabi Munda?Sardars or Mona Punjabi these Munda’s consider themselves the baap of everything. Yes boys you are definitely the baap of every bullshits. The- know-it- all attitude, we rock, we are the best; jingles churns down our cerebral cortex. Pompous and pretentious these Munda’s are large sized men with big male ‘ego’. Casanova by nature, flirting is the inborn talent of north Indian desi boys. According to them, to get a girl is, "Mere baaye haath ka khel hai ji, is mein kya hai, do chaar meethi gal dusso aur lo ladki-in within a minute.” No dude you seriously need to consider your attitude Mr.Chant Munda. We know that your MummyPapa and TaayaTaayi have loads of moolah to spend on your ayaashi’s but please spare the good girls. Keep your horns under control before it gets stuck on the wall and put you into puddle. And when you know your MummyPapa and TaayaTaayi are going to search for a bride for you, after you end your Ayashigiri then what’s with the unlimited laisions and affairs? Is there any need? No, seriously man, spare us!

Male chauvinist pig, hypocrites, liars, demons, losers, king of profanities, aggressive bullshitters and a big time rascals that’s how we girls describe you guys on our dinner table. And after reading this you might want to abuse me,....so, go ahead, that’s your attribute, to showcase your weaknesses... so, blurt it out and prove to the world that you are ‘so not worth it’ species, who couldn’t digest female superiority in the world and also in their life.Oh no! no! I am not feminist but a Sexist. Ahan...Did it hurt?..aww..koi gal nai ji, chalta hai...



(Disclaimer- Read the above piece of writing at your own risk. Weak hearted, jilted, unrequited, fanatic, egoistic, mentally ill and nil boys should avoid reading it.)